There was this old Texas farmer sitting at a bar, staring at his drink, not talking. After he’d sat like that for about half an hour, a big, tattooed, city fellow stepped up, grabbed the drink from the farmer, and chugged it down.
“Come on old man, I was just joking.” The city fellow said, slapping the old farmer on the back. “Here, I’ll buy you another drink. I just can’t stand to see a man cry.”
“No… It’s not that.” The old farmer swiped at his tears with the back of his calloused hand. “This day has been about the worst of my life. First, a bunch of coyotes got into the chicken coop. When I heard the ruckus, I grabbed my rifle and ran out of the house just in time to see one of them running off with my prize rooster. So, I shot that coyote. But the bullet went straight through him and into the gas tank of my new John Deere Tractor. Which caused it to blow.”
The old farmer sniffed. “Lord knows, I loved that tractor.”
The farmer looked the city fellow right straight in the face. “But it got worse. The explosion scared the bull, who charged the fence and ran out into the road where a lady in a passing car hit it. Hurt it bad. Even as my bull lay dying, that lady got out of her car and screamed at me, claiming it was my fault her car was damaged. Then, she said she was going to sue me for everything I had. Well, I was so upset, I went home to tell my wife and found her in bed with the rancher four pastures over. So, I left my home and came to this bar. And I was just about putting an end to my life, when you showed up.”
“I’m sure sorry, mister. At least let me buy you a new drink. What was it you were having?”
“Poison.”
A Classic Joke – Author Unknown
3 comments
Good one have had days like that!!!
We all have Jim. Anyone who says they haven’t – is LYING!!!!
Love this one, Karen! Poor guy(s)!